Are greatly clichéd.
Actually, there haven't been any rumors. That I've seen, anyways. I suppose you all could be rumoring behind my back. But you guys wouldn't do that to me!
Trust me, I'm well aware that we're coming up on 3 weeks since the last update. And this one doesn't really count, because it's an update about not updating. (How meta.) And I'm sure you're all breathlessly awaiting my next installment. So what's the holdup?
Well, partly it's the usual excuses about life getting in the way, work, vacation, kids, where's my jetpack, get off my lawn, grumble grumble grump. Which is all true, but not really it. And I'm about to go on vacation again, which certainly isn't going to help. Hashtag humblebrag or something.
And it's not that I've been lacking in inspiration. I mean, I did blow my best personal stories to get the blog started off, but I literally have 6 other posts sitting here in various states of draft, a couple others in my head, and I'm sure I can come up with additional embarrassing stories about myself if I think about it for a bit. Content ideas are not a problem.
My problem is that I've lost my funny. I'm feeling like the gang from The West Wing when they're trying to write President Bartlett's speech for the Correspondents' Dinner. All those posts are sitting there in draft because, quite frankly, they're pretty lousy right now.
So instead, you get this lousy whining. Aren't you lucky?
See, this is how bad it is. I can normally at least be funny when I complain, but I can't even manage that right now!
You know who can, though? Kieran. The other day in the car, he was whining about something in the back seat. And when Kieran whines, he tends to get quieter (thank goodness for small mercies!) and higher-pitched (as one does when one whines), neither of which is particularly conducive to being heard over road noise. So we told him that we couldn't hear him while he was whining. And in the tiniest, quietest voice you could possibly hear from the back seat, he says, "But I want to whine..."
.
.
.
Okay, you know what? To salvage the rest of this post and make it worth your while, you get a couple more Kieran stories. Because 3-year-olds are funny, and life, lemons, lemonade, all that. (For the record, this is a metaphor for my writing struggles. I did not just compare my child to a lemon. Just thought I should clarify that.)
Story two: Kieran is at that stage where he'll talk to his stuffed animals, and also make them talk. Normally, this just happens like a normal conversation, except Kieran is saying both sides. Today, however, I went in to get him up from his nap, and he's hiding behind Beebee, his teddy bear. (Hiding has been a very fun game lately. So, playing along, I said, "Is there a Kieran in here? I can't see him!" And Kieran replied, "'Kieran's not here', said Beebee."
No, I didn't get those quotation marks wrong. Apparently reading books with character dialogue has made a big impression on him.
Story three: The other day, Kieran and I were going down the stairs to build a train track with his wooden train set, and his Duplos were still sitting out from playing with them before naptime. Kieran takes my hand, looks up at me with all seriousness, and says, "If you want to play with the Legos later, you just tell me, and we can go play with them instead of the trains. You just have to tell me, and we can do that."
He has become quite the little mimic of things we say to him. I'm just glad he chooses to mimic those sorts of things most of the time...
Okay, that's it for today. Hopefully I can be funny in the future without having to rely on my 3-year-old for inspiration. Valete!
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